Friday April 10, 2026
Good & Holy Friday + the Addiction Story
The day that I’m writing this is Eastern Orthodox Holy Friday. Translation: in the Orthodox Christian Church, this is our Good Friday. The Friday before Great & Holy Pascha (our Easter), and yes, it is a week after Western Easter. Why are there multiple liturgical calendars putting major holidays on different schedules? That is a great question for a historian …some other time.
Good Friday/Holy Friday marks the end of Great Lent - a 40-day fasting period. For 40 days, we Orthodox abstain from all meat, dairy, alcohol of any sort (except for Holy Communion), and oil. Those who are strong enough to do so also eat less altogether; as little as one meal a day in the evenings! We’re at church more by adding two, three, or more services to our weekly routines. When we are at home, those who are able will also stand for their own prayers more often.
On top of all of this, these are forty days meant for deep introspection; for considering our sins, character defects, and “coming deaths”; and for repenting the best we can. It’s a somber time that is meant to be challenging on every level.
As we go through Great Lent, we’re hungry, we’re tired, and often we’re more anxious, cranky, and prone to temptations of all sorts - whether to lust or rage, to dissociate or act out our inner discomfort on those around us - BUT we labor together.
This 40 Day Fast comes to a close during Holy Week, and we commemorate the final days of Jesus Christ in the flesh upon the earth. It is the most somber, most grueling week of all. Those who are able may be in church for up to 30 hours throughout the week! Everything leads to Pascha.
Pascha commemorates the Resurrection of Christ and the defeat of death for all people for all time. It is the centerpiece of the Christian faith. We call it the “Feast of Feasts” and it is the most important feast day of the year! We commemorate it with a vigil service: a whole lot of hymns, prayers, candles, a procession, then the Eucharist…and then a FEAST! This turns the year, and begins a week when we’re forbidden FROM fasting and commanded to feast.
The weeks following are bright, joyous, and so very alive. The church colors change from dark purple to brilliant white, all our music tones shift from minor to major keys, and we rejoice and we feast!
What is heaven’s name does this have to do with addiction and sobriety?
The Addiction Story is one of extremes and excess. Extreme behaviors in search of extreme sensations. Taking in an excess of life at full blast. Maximum pleasure, the quickest escape, the highest high, the greatest thrill, the biggest risk, the newest new thing we can find! We can’t imagine ever saying no to ourselves about anything we could ever want. Deep down, we’re afraid of the pain we imagine we’ll feel if we’re not full to the max with whatever pleasure the moment offers.
Sometimes this compulsion inverts and takes the form of extreme aversion. The alcoholic becomes the abolitionist. The sex addict becomes the one who hates being touched and is the loudest voice against any sexual expression. The binge eater begins to restrict their food. The impulse spender becomes a miser. The pleasure junkie and overeater becomes a gym rat. The hustler becomes a workaholic. And everyone becomes more angry.
We’ve begun to abstain from one set of destructive vices, which is good! But without learning how to be healthy people, our new abstinence becomes a playground for new vices of character: Pride. Perfectionism. People Pleasing. Controlling. Really, we’re still afraid, but this time to lose control.
If the addiction story is one of extreme indulgence paired with extreme aversion, what then is Sobriety? I propose that the Addiction Story is a corrupting of an otherwise good thing. That good thing is being in a seasonal rhythm of life that moves gently back & forth between fasting & feasting.
There are times to be strict with ourselves, to push ourselves, work hard, and even go a bit beyond our limits. There are also times to rest, being gentle with ourselves, slowing down, and conserve energy. Our relationship to food is one of the easiest ways to practice with this principle of feasting & fasting. Some days we should go without. Some days we should eat a little more. What foods you go without and on which days is a matter particular to your life. Which days you mark as being special & fitting for a feast is for you to decide.
You should have both, and you should have quite a few just average days. We can’t feast forever; that would destroy us. Nor can we fast forever; there would be nothing of us left! But we can do both in a cycle. It is this cycling that invites us to be present with each phase of our lives and intentional in the daily choices we make. It is this changing of rhythms & rigors that heightens our awareness and helps us develop a tolerance for our own bodies and feelings.
So then, on this Great & Holy Friday, two days shy of the biggest feast of the Orthodox Year, and just following six weeks of intentional scarcity, I invite you to consider: Are you in a season where you ought to be more strict …or more gentle with yourself? Challenge yourself a little, then plan for a time to rest. Do this again and again and again. Somewhere in the middle: May you find peace.
Learned a lot about orthodox Easter here. Thanks for that and the unique perspective on the natural ebbs and flows in life. I definitely lived my life in those extremes!